I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
