Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
