try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
