member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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