my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
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