You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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