I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Randomize
