so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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