Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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