oh god the rape fog is back!
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Randomize
