I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
