I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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