That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
