he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Floor bacon is actually really good
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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