are you so shy because you have an std?
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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