I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
