He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Randomize