U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
