tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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