Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize
