You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Randomize
