do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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