Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
