its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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