What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Randomize
