i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
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