I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
