I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Randomize
