It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Randomize
