Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
