WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Randomize
