i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
only you would photoshop your dick
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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