I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
