So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
whose ass print is on the piano?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
