Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
