i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Randomize
