I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
