How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Randomize