she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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