If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
