im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize