someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I'm just crazy horny about you
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
