Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
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