I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
