Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
