butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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