eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
