can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
