Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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