Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Randomize
